Yo bro have you heard of stoicism?

If you are like anyone else in the self-improvement space you are no stranger to stoicism.

You’ve probably heard about its utility and how you must be stoic to be a great man.

But what is stoicism?

Simply put: It is the ability to control your emotions.

Throughout your life, bad things will happen. Your partner will break up with you, you won't get the job you wanted, you may get in a car crash. Like my friend Timone said, "Bad things happen and you can't do anything about it."

And that's a fact of life. When sh** hits the fan there is nothing you can do.

Except for one thing.

While you can't control the outside world and what happens to you, there is one person you control. You guessed it, it's you.

No matter what is happening in your life, you can't control it. You can't control the situation, what others do, or how it affects you.

But you can control how you react.

When your girlfriend breaks up with you it is going to hurt you. When you get cut from your sports team cause you aren't good enough it's going to hurt. When you get knocked out in front of everyone at the school in a fight, that's definitely going to hurt.

What's important is how you react though. You can't control how someone else's actions will affect you. But you can control your reaction to it.

When your girl breaks up with you, do you cry, give up on life and become an incel? Or do you feel the pain and choose to move forward, build up your body, get some money, and show her what she's missing out on.

When you get cut from the team do you go home, cry, and decide to never play the sport you love again? Or do you cry, and then wake up the next day and start practicing and working so that you never have to be in that situation again.

Once you realize that how you react to something is always your choice, you realize that stoicism isn't a philosophy. Rather it is a way that you choose to live.

Being stoic isn't only being emotionless and a rock. It's about how you deal with your emotions.

If you break down and give up every time something bad happens in your life, you'll go nowhere and no one's gonna like you.

But if you deal with failure and bounce back every time, success is inevitable.

My favorite stoic quotes.

Now that you know what stoicism is, here are 3 famous quotes from some of the most well known stoics of history.

1. "A mind that is anxious about future events is miserable." - Seneca

In this quote from Seneca, he is telling you to live in the present. If you focus on the future you will get anxious. The future is unknown, and humans hate the unknown.

Have you noticed that it is much easier to finish 3 sets of 1 minute planks as opposed to going as long as someone else says?

That's because we fear the unknown. We don't know if that person will ever stop us, if we'll have to plank for 10 seconds or 10 minutes, and that scares us.

Knowing gives humans a sense of control over their lives.

But the fact is that you will never know everything. And you definitely won't know what will happen in the future. Because of that you need to live in the present.

The past is already done. You can't change it, you can only learn from it.

The future hasn't happened yet. You have no idea what will happen for sure.

The only thing you can do is pour your energy into the present moment of every day. As I write this blog on the lakeside patio of my campus I'm not thinking about how well it will do, or what the people around me are thinking of me.

I'm writing, taking in the scenery for inspiration, and enjoying the moment. In the end, how this article performs doesn't matter very much. The only thing that matters is that I use my energy in this moment to give you as much value as possible.

And once you live life like this, moment-by-moment, you get the most out of the time that you have.

2. “You have power over your mind - not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength” - Marcus Aurelius

This is a classic from Marcus Aurelius. You have to understand that the outside world is chaotic. Crazy things are always happening, and it doesn't matter how much power you have, you can't control it all.

What you must understand is that chaos is constant. Problems will never go away. Even if you have a lot of money, your problems won't go away, they will only change.

So if you can't control the world around you, what can you control?

You can only control yourself! No man or woman has power over your mind. Once you realize this the world becomes your oyster.

You are the captain of your ship and you can only control what you think and what you do. You control your perspective on life and how you react to it.

If you don’t make an effort to think about how you want to live, and take action that aligns with these thoughts you will never have what you want.

Once you control your thoughts, your actions will follow suit. Once your thoughts and actions align the world will take notice and you will have results.

3. "It is what it is" - Some Random Kid on TikTok

It is what it is.

You're rich and healthy? It is what it is. You're broke and out of shape? It is what it is.

Like my football coach always says you have to be where your two feet are. You have to play the cards you were dealt. There is nothing else you can do.

You have to look at where you are.

You may be in college and not enjoying it and wanting to drop out. You could be in a soul-sucking job that you hate and want to escape. Or you could be living the life of your dreams, traveling around the world, and wearing cool clothes.

It doesn't matter where you are. What's important is that you accept where you are.

Don't settle for it, but understand and realize that you are where you are because of the choices and decisions you made. And all you can do is determine where it is you want to go. And once you know you must go. You can't wait around. You must take action.

So understand it is what it is. You are where you are. And you are going where you are going. But the choice is up to you to determine where you go.

Conclusion

From this whole article I hope you understand.

Stoicism isn't some philosophy or a set of thinking. It is a conscious decision. It's a decision to take control of your destiny. To refuse to be a victim to the circumstances you have. To keep moving forward despite the emotions you feel.

Stoicism isn't about being a heartless, cold-blooded sigma-male, like Patrick Bateman from American Psycho.

It's about realizing that the outside world is chaotic and oftentimes doesn't go your way. But instead of getting down and giving in to your circumstances you choose to rise above. You choose to keep moving forward towards your ultimate goal.

So whether you're depressed, your girlfriend broke up with you, you aren't where you want on your sports team, or you hate your job; it is what it is.

These are all true. But that doesn't mean you can't change it. You always have the power to change what you do and think. Start thinking and acting in a way that gets you closer to your goals and they will happen.

Don't wait. Go.